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(Source: gvmze)

tags: reblogs + thoughts + writing +
» thursday afternoon.

half-closed eyes at
half-past five
half-open window
half-opened book

(it smells like rain
where you’ve been
before)

half-shut eyes
half-closed window
half-listening to
half-apologetic voicemail

(it looks like night
where you won’t 
ever be
again)

booklust13:

It’s Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizzini

tags: reblogs + quotes + thoughts +

Ten Women I Have Been Warned Against Becoming:

1. The Girl Who Takes Up Too Much Space, always, her shoulders too wide in stairwells, her hips too big in doorways, her voice too loud in classes. This woman does not understand the art of crumbling, of curling herself tight like the spiral of a fern, soft, delicate, unwilling to reach out the ivy of her fingers to grasp onto what should rightfully be hers. This is a beast, an elephant, a moving mountain and she is capable of flattening you, she is capable of ruining you, she is capable of making you feel as small and insignificant in her life as she is supposed to be. You are this woman’s footnote to history, you are her side note in song lyrics, you are constantly interrupted by her with a witty joke you wish you thought of. I asked what the problem was with being a steamroller instead of a sunflower and I was laughed down.

2. The Beautiful One, the long hair or the slim waist or the pretty eyes or the lips like bowstrings. This woman looks good in everything because she’s confident in whatever you put her in. She’ll cut her hair short on you no matter how you like it, she’ll wear high heels and step on your opinions, she’ll look hot as hell no matter what size she is. See, the reason you can’t trust her is because women like this don’t need your permission, they’ll do as they please and get away with it. They’ll say no to you, over and over. Teach your daughters that beautiful means dangerous, teach them to distrust women who love themselves. Equate beautiful with vapid, equate pretty with stupid, take their power from them. Say they’re vain for their makeup, refuse to see them without it. These women are snakes, they are serpents. I said maybe the problem lies with you being unable to control yourself and was told to get off my pedestal.

3. A Bitch. Women are supposed to be ladies in the street but will tear skin under sheets. I’m told: Never raise your voice. Speak gently. Submit. Hold your opinion against your lips and when you admit to it, make sure it comes out as a butterfly wing suggestion. Don’t disagree. Don’t undermine someone else’s authority, regardless of whether or not they deserve your respect. Someone touches you, just move away from them. Don’t hit. Don’t talk back. Be like the ruins of Rome, only beautiful if you can’t hear your quiet death.

4. The Needy One. I have heard how others spit when they talk about how she gave you everything and you shoved it back down her throat until she choked on it, until she came back crawling and asked you what she did, until her palms and knees were scraped for want of just a little affection - never be this woman, I’m told, because she’s a joke and the joke is that she dared to have more emotion than you did. The truth is, I’m told, the one who cares less in a partnership is the one who wins. I didn’t know this was a competition.

5. The Cock Tease, certified stripper, how dare that girl look like that and not want me to sleep with her. Lust is always personified as a lady in red with a dress slit up her thigh. Lust is sinful because it’s power, it’s not asking for attention - it’s demanding it. I’m told she is the worst kind of woman, that looking good is supposed to be some kind of shame on her kin. I’m told not to leave the house in such a short skirt, not with a shirt so low, not with a lace back, not with high heels, not dressed like that. My lipstick can’t be too red, my hair can’t be too mussed, I can’t just “turn someone on like that and then leave them wanting.” I mentioned that instant gratification actually ruins our psyche and was told that being led on was “exhausting.” I said that there was a difference between purposefully tricking someone into liking you and just being attractive or friendly. I was told there’s also a difference between coffee and tea but both result in caffeine. I said, “I’ve been turned on in class by the girls I talk to but I didn’t expect anything from them,” and they said, “It’s different, you’re not a man,” but couldn’t explain where that difference was.

6. A Slut, obviously ruined by another person’s touch. It doesn’t matter how many people she’s actually been with, it’s all about the rumors she carries with her. Easy. Harlot. You’ll still try to get with her, you’ll still take her into your bed and kiss her and say things you don’t mean - but you’ll defame her name when you talk to your buddies. My father used to say “A slut is fine for the night, but the virgin is who you take home and marry.” Maybe he didn’t know he was teaching his daughter to hate her sexuality. Maybe he didn’t know that every time she’d be kissed, her whole system would shake until she felt ready to combust, shame and self-hatred shivering against her spine. Maybe he didn’t know she’d disconnect emotions and sex because he always told her, “Boys are different, they won’t care about you.” Nobody said to her that it was okay to experiment. See, the funny thing is, I’m a dancer so I know exactly where my center of gravity is. I know how hard I’ll fall in each direction. Yet out of fear of getting hurt, I won’t let a single person inside of my bed.

7. The Soulmate. Never love romance more than you love being cynical. Never show weakness, never like pink, never think maybe you might find someone nice and settle down with them. Someone will find you, I was told, And if you’re lucky, he’ll put up with you when you start getting old. Never be the woman who believes in happily ever after, never be dumb enough to think maybe someone could love you after all of your mistakes. It has nothing to do with whether or not a family is important to you and you’re in a good place where a relationship would make your life better - you’re not a princess. You don’t get married, you settle.

8. The Girl With Strength, who can outrun everyone and who is stronger than her boyfriend. “See the thing about boys,” says my daddy, “Is that you have to let them win.” I sat at home and read stories about Artemis and wanted to become the huntress, too. I wanted to howl at the moon, I wanted to slay the beasts that bested me, I wanted to rule my kingdom with bloody fists. But girls are never athletes, never supposed to be “built,” regardless of the fact civilizations were constructed on our spines and we made homes in war by the steel of our ribs. Never be strong. We are supposed to wilt.

9. The Lady CEO: because if you choose work over family, are you really a girl? How dare you fight your way to the top through every pair of eyes that bore through your blouse, through every meeting where you were hushed by the sound of someone else talking, through every time someone called you “sweetie,” how dare you yearn for something. Is your husband the stay-at-home one? I can’t imagine how that is going. He’s not a real man, after all. I don’t give it long before the divorce. How dare you decide you’re happy being single. Don’t you know you’re supposed to bear children. Where is your honor? Where is your wisdom? Who cares if you are the leader, the best suited for your position, the quickest-thinking, the one who makes the hardest clients come back again. Don’t you see? Across history, women have been terrible at success. They always lose their man in the end. (When I said, “I would rather be a famous author than a mediocre mother,” I was told, “No, don’t worry, you’ll be a fine mommy.”)

10. THE GIRL I AM: FIRECRACKER AND DON’T YOU FUCKING FORGET IT I’LL RIP YOU TO SHREDS AND I WON’T FUCKING REGRET IT I’M NOT YOUR PRETTY GIRL I’M NOT YOUR ANYTHING I’M PERFECT, MOTHERFUCKER, AND I’M NOT GOING TO GIVE UP WHAT I’M DOING. I DON’T WANT TO BE “LADYLIKE” THAT LITERALLY MEANS NOTHING I’M NOT GOING TO STOP STANDING UP AND DEMANDING WHAT’S COMING TO ME. I’M GONNA BE SOMEBODY. I’M GONNA MAKE THEM REMEMBER ME. I REFUSE TO BE OVERSHADOWED IN HISTORY. I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO CREATE BUT YOU MADE ME A DRAGON YOU PUT ME IN THE FIRE AND WHEN I STOPPED BURNING I LEARNED HOW TO GLOW DON’T THINK YOU CAN STOP ME YOU CAN’T TAME A TORNADO.

In respectful response to a poem tilted, “Ten men women have warned me against becoming." /// r.i.d (via inkskinned)
» if words were weapons, you’d be sorry you stepped onto the battlefield.

lately 
i’ve been
tired of
trying
to read
you

(i call myself a writer, darling, i have a pretty vast vocabulary and a pretty amazing imagination, i don’t always trust spellcheck but i do google every new unfamiliar concept i want to include within my pages, i call myself a writer, darling, because ink to paper means a lot to me, even if most my intricate dreams and incomprehensible emotions are lost in translation, i call myself a writer, darling, because i am one and i know what i’m about or at least, i know how to question myself)

lately
you’ve been
hard
to understand
and i
find myself wondering
if you’re even
worth trying
to pen down

» windchimes in the summer sounds so lonely now.

sometimes i look out the window
when the wind 
tickles my arms
and the sky is on the verge
of breaking in
and i wonder
if you still laugh the same
the way you did
when you were with me
the birds sing quieter
and none of my neighbours
know the answer
so i close my eyes
and pretend 
i can still hear 
that beautiful melody

She is not perfect. You are not perfect. The question is whether or not you are perfect for each other.
—Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting (1997)

(Source: larmoyante)

tags: reblogs + quotes + thoughts + huh +
Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I’m not living.
Jonathan Safran FoerExtremely Loud and Incredibly Close (via feellng)
tags: reblogs + quotes + thoughts +
You're my favorite blog on tumblr. Your writing is absolutely beautiful and seeing your posts makes me smile. Thank you :)
Anonymous

image

omigosh anon, this is the best thing to wake up to. that flower’s for you~
yes i’m someone’s favourite blog that’s one thing off my bucket list i’m very very happy to hear that my blog can make you smile, i hope you continue to smile! 

thank you, anon, i hope you day goes well (:

» voicemail.

don’t call me
at four in the morning
to giggle
like you’re pissed drunk
because they won’t listen
to you
the way i do

don’t call me
at four in the morning
to cry
about all the things
you haven’t yet tasted
when you didn’t
even bother to
come home last night

don’t call me
anymore

A writer is a world trapped in a person.
—Victor Hugo (via capulaid)

(Source: wordsnquotes)

» his song.

his song
is winter’s laughter
muted tones
and faded tinge
soft wind
that screams
nostalgia

his song
is city lights
in the distance
when the moon
hangs low
like careful eyes
tracing your skin

his song
is morning rain
stained red sky
and tired eyes
as windows open
and you come home

» Handwritten Post
1: Write your URL in some writing that you thought were super cool when you were younger. Eg, bubble letters, digital clock letters, letters with lots of embellishments, or letters with smiley faces in them.
2: Write a list of all the countries or states you’ve been to. Write a comment on each of them. Or some, if you can’t be bothered.
3: List your top three statistical Tumblr crushes and draw their icons.
4: Draw a selfie.
5: Name three things you like about yourself.
6: Do you like the climate you live in? What do you like about it or what would you change?
7: What is your current mood? Write and/or draw.
8: Can you tie a bow-tie? A regular tie? If yes, how and when did you learn?
9: Pick something from your immediate surroundings and tell the story behind the item.
10: The last time you noticed you’d put a piece of clothing on incorrectly, i.e. backwards/inside out/etc?
11: What is a typical breakfast for you?
12: How do you take your favorite coffee? Eg strong or weak? Black or with cream/milk and/or sugar/sweetener? Filter, espresso, French press or instant? Hot or iced? Regular or decaf? None of the above?
13: Describe your favorite food. Who makes it?
14: List 5 movies that you love.
15: What is a wanky memory from Tumblr that still makes you blush?
16: What brought you to Tumblr?
17: Have you had any real Tumblr crushes? If you want to keep your mystery, answer with a drawing.
18: Do you prefer to text or call your friends?
19: Write an autograph version of your URL.
20: Pick up the nearest printed material in your first language and copy out a random paragraph.
you shake your fist and point your fingers and set fire to anything that is a few shades of a wrong in your eyes
but we all bleed the same, don’t we?

foxmouth:

Northern Lights, 2014 | by Daniel Leifheit